Sometimes I Feel Like Somebody’s Watching Me

And I have no privacy — Rockwell (singer), 1984

A Day in Your Life

Your alarm goes off at 5:47 a.m., a seemingly random time, but it’s connected to your bed, which has motion sensors embedded in the mattress that inform your clock when you’ve had the optimal amount of REM and deep sleep.

The coffee machine grinds the beans, and a fresh cup is ready at the same time the shower reaches the optimal temperature. While you wash your 2,000 body parts, your car pre-conditions the cabin so it’s cozy and the snow is melted off your windows just in time to beat the rush hour traffic to the train station. If you do encounter a slowdown on the freeway, self-driving functionality allows you to relax while the car does all the starting and stopping for you, maintaining its position in the lane and an adequate distance to prevent rear-ending the car in front of you if it slams on its brakes, but not too much space so an opportunistic fellow commuter can shove their way into your buffer zone.

As you slip into a parking space at the train station, your bank account is charged for the day’s parking due to the EZ Pass affixed to your windshield. The toll on the way to the train station was paid automatically by video cameras mounted above the freeway and using text recognition to identify your license plate.

Safety and efficiency on the commuter rail are ensured by GPS to prevent the trains from colliding, taking into account the weight of…